COVID Baby
2020 sure has been a roller coaster ride and a half. I have read many COVID baby posts and spoken with clients and friends who brought their babes earth side mid pandemic. Some feel ripped off, some feel as though their rights have been stripped from them, some have been disappointed in the pre-natal care they have received and some have embraced the chaos. I am typing this one handed as Charlie Rose who is now 8 weeks old is snuggled up in my other arm. So, my COVID baby story is a happy one.
The global pandemic hit home 7 months into my second pregnancy. Queensland along with the rest of Australia went into lockdown. Essential local trips only! Yes, it is essential that we go and see a lady about a trampoline…we have a toddler. Once we were set, we battened down the hatches and settled in for the long haul. As I operate Happy Place Pilates from home and work as a stay at home mum I was used to being home anyway.
Things pretty much stayed on course for me. Our beautiful Doula, Prue did house calls. My OB appointments continued as usual with the addition of temperature checks and an always empty waiting room. At this stage hospitals were scrambling to introduce the most effective policies to keep everyone safe. In the back of my mind I knew that many hospitals had restricted numbers of support people and visitors. However, at the time everything was so fluid there was no point losing sleep over it.
The borders were still closed with my family firmly stuck on the other side two weeks out from my EDD. One good thing about defence life is that you end up with a defence family. So when your actual family can’t be there to look after babe number one, while you welcome babe number two into the world, your defence family can.
A call to the hospital revealed the number of support people had recently increased. You were now allowed two support people. However, no persons under the age of 16 were allowed to visit, including siblings. I breathed a sigh of relief that I didn’t have to choose between BW and Prue. It may seem like an easy decision for some, but to me, BW and our Doula were neck and neck when it came to birthing this babe. As it dawned on me that Zoe would not be allowed into the hospital an overwhelming sensation welled up in me. It’s hard to say exactly what that feeling was, maybe a cross between guilt, anxiety and sadness.
At my 39-week OB visit all was looking good to VBAC. I mentioned my relief at not having to choose between BW and Prue. My OB pulled up correspondence she had received from the hospital. Only one support person was allowed in birthing suite. Still no persons under the age of 16. S#$T! She gave me the details of the person in charge at the hospital so that I could check for myself. The head midwife at the hospital kindly took the time to reach out to me and confirmed the policy was in fact only one support person in a birthing suite. So the decision was made, BW would be my support person at the hospital. Prue would be there to support me at home and would still come to the hospital and if refused entry, so be it.
A week or so past my guess date I was eager to bring this babe earth side. I elected to have a stretch and sweep and that night I spent 30 minutes upside down after sex, willing the prostaglandins to do their thing (labour induction). That night the prostaglandins did not disappoint. The surges/contractions, whatever you’d like to call them, were enough to wake me but I was able to sleep in between. Things settled down slightly the next day and intensified that night. BW was a good sport getting up with me each and every contraction to apply counter pressure on my low back, best pain relief ever (thanks Prue). Come morning I was so exhausted that I just lay there and rolled with each contraction.
Once I got up and started my day things settled down again. Talking to Prue she suggested a bath and some R&R. Excellent idea! As I soaked in the bath that same overwhelming sensation welled up in me again. I burst into a spectacular sobbing mess (you know, like kids do when they can’t catch their breath). It dawned on me that I’d not processed that feeling initially as I couldn’t make sense of it, but now it was clear. I’d never left Zoe overnight before, let alone leaving her for four or five nights in a row!
BW came in mid cry to let me know he was taking Ruby dog for a walk. When he asked “What’s up?” I blurted out that I felt bad for leaving Zo and turned into even more of a blubbering mess. BW laughed, reminding me that she’d be having the time of her life with our amazing friends and their daughter. There was absolutely nothing to be upset about. Although empathy is not his strong suit, BW always speaks the truth.
It felt like having a big cry unblocked something that had been stalling my labour. Having never been in labour before, I found it hard to tell where I was really at. I didn’t want to go up to the hospital and be sent home but things were definitely moving along. Walking seemed to bring on contractions and resting seemed to slow them down. So, arm in arm BW and I paced up and down our backyard. Late that afternoon, Prue popped over to baby-sit me, while BW dropped Zo over at our friends. A couple of hours later BW returned home and I was tired and just wanted to lay in bed with him. So, Prue went home for a couple of hours.
When the OMG WTF is happening started, BW called Prue to come back. Prue arrived to find my water had broken and all I wanted to do was a poo. Despite only hours ago Prue and I had the “it’s not a poo” conversation, I was convinced it was a poo. By this stage there was no pain just an uncontrollable pushing sensation. As I yelled Prue to make it stop whilst almost ripping the door handle off the bathroom door I made the decision it was time to go to the hospital.
BW scrambled to pack the car, and by pack the car I mean meticulously cover every available surface with towels. He returned only to announce he wanted to swap cars. For a lady that was about to have a baby I think I took the car swap news pretty well…I didn’t yell. In the car we get, me kneeling and facing backwards and Prue following behind, in case she needed to catch the baby on the side of the road. I remembered the song that was playing in the car and when I looked it up on JJJ’s Recently Played, there it was – Energy by Stace Cadet and KLP played at 10:53pm.
The bump pulling in to the emergency entrance let me know that I was alive. Before I knew it, BW was banging on the locked emergency doors. Next second, emergency staff were trying to get me out of the car and into a wheelchair and I blatantly refused move. Then, the voice of an angel came from the driver’s side, “I’ve got you if you need to have this baby right here right now,” a midwife said as she spread out a green sheet with some utensils in it. When I looked back to the emergency doors I saw a man pushing a gurney. “That,” I said “I can go on that.” And off we went into the hospital.
A quick check revealed I was fully dilated and we were off to the birthing suite. I felt Prue’s hand on mine and knew both her and BW were there. BW asked the midwife for gas, she promptly replied that it was too late for gas to which BW responded “Not for her, for me”. The lights went down so I knew my OB had arrived. After that my body just did its thing. No one rushed me, my OB provided empowering words of encouragement (from memory she called me a “boss”) and answered my questions which were mostly “What’s going on back there?”. Prue took some amazing happy snaps. At 11:56pm Charlie Rose joined us.
I spent four nights on the ward. Three of which I experienced feelings of absolute euphoria. I had heard of these hormone induced highs before, but I didn’t experience it with Zoe. No global pandemic keeping my family away could crush my spirit during those three days. Come day four, a toddler holding his dad’s hand walked past my room and I came crashing back to reality. Our amazing neighbours had been looking after Zoe for a few hours each day so BW could spend some time with Charlie and I. This was such a gift. The gift of allowing a dad to bond with his new babe and support his woman. A gift that we could never repay but will pay forwards someday.
For me, bringing Charlie into the world amidst a global pandemic was bitter sweet. Charlie is now 2 months old and still hasn’t met her extended family in person, which breaks my heart. However, having friends, neighbours, clients, midwives and Prue rally around us to make sure we were supported not only for the birth of Charlie, but during the weeks that followed, is testament to human kindness. Kindness that we will be forever grateful for.
If your in the market for an amazing Doula and live in the Brisbane Ipswich area I can’t recommend Prue highly enough. You can check out her business page here.